Marriage Monday added kids in the mix (for the topic) this month. Let me admit that in my mind, the term " raising boys" includes (raising) my hubby, ehe :D
God blessed us with two highly-spirited boys. Zachary is 5 while Gabriel is 2 yrs. and 9 mos. old. I figure this is the best topic where I could have something to say about. And there's more to learn everyday.
I'm re-titling e-Moms topic to:
Raising Boys: What To Do
1. Always show them your love and affection. They want and need to be kissed, hugged and touched. The more I love my kids, the more that they become loving. Showing them your love will help them grow as men who are loving and respectful to women.
2. Talk to them about their feelings. Help them sort out what they feel. It won't make them appear weak but hence will help them grow strong individuals who are understanding and sensitive to others' feelings. Don't tell them that boys don't cry coz they will when they get hurt and hearing that statement will make them feel insecure. Though I have a "crying corner" for my kids where I let them cry for as long as they want. Turns out they stop whining or crying when I ask them to go there.
3. Give them lots of space to run and explore. Understand that boys are naturally active. They like to move around, climb, look and touch things (dirt especially). Set some rules for safety but let them practice their budding independence. So when it's time for them to behave ex. inside the church, it's easy for them to obey because they know the difference between a playground and the place of worship.
4. React not much when you see something not so ordinary. Ex. my youngest son likes playing with a barbie doll or plays with the sensitive part of his body. They will much more be curious why you are reacting too much. And the more they would want to find it out themselves and there's more trouble with that. With them, there's nothing wrong about it. So you just need to gently divert their attention to other things.
Our bestfriends has a daughter and my son openly expresses his affection to the girl. The girl is in his drawing of his dream house in his book and when I asked him why is she there, he said it's because "I always, always like her." This morning he's busy writing on an envelope and when he showed me, there's a pair of scissors inside. He said it's a surprise for the girl. I just told him if you want to give her a gift, we'll just buy a new item when we go to the store.
What I can see is a pure heart, pure admiration from my son and I don't want to bring any malice to it. If time passes and they grow up and still like each other then that's the time they need guidance about dating and so on, hehe :D
5. Teach them about God. Teach them how to depend on God through prayer. Talk about God and his words in every opportunity. I found out that they become more obedient when they have learned about who God is in our life.
Deuteronomy 6:7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
One thing that I always have in mind is:
Galatians 5:22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control.
And since my kids are the ones I have fellowship with everyday, I try my best to practice it always.